Today in one of my classes, my professor expressed the importance of finding out what makes you happy, grabbing onto it and following it with all your heart. Knowing what is important to you and what you enjoy doing and following that bliss and success will come to you. It is a concept I had heard before, but for some reason today it resonated with me on a deeper level than I had let it before. Maybe because for some reason, now it seems like finding my bliss is a much more tangible option. I'm close to finishing up school, I have a job I like, I'm surrounded by a wonderful community of friends and I have a loving and supportive family. At the same time though, I can't seem to get past all the little stumbling blocks that keep me firmly entrenched in adolescence. The fact that I have a mental list of "People Who's Existence Annoy Me to a Level that I require Ranting About Them and We Don't Even Live in the Same City And I Probably Really Don't Know Them Except for the Internet" is assuredly a sign of this. I waffle back and fourth on these stupid little things a lot. On one hand I know I am egotistical enough to think that what I think about these people really matters and on the other hand I fully realize the immaturity of it all right down the vaguely clever remarks I quip about people on the list. I think I just *heart* petty, stupid drama for the same reasons people watch soap operas, the entertainment value. Except what makes this different is that these are real people, with real feelings and not scripted characters. I need to remember that.
As to the rest of my life, it's been some ups and some downs with players past and present. Funny how people show up again when you are least ready for it and funny how some disappear when you really wish they wouldn't.
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